While aimless flipping channels Wednesday night, we stumbled upon maybe the most wonderfully, disturbing show we've ever seen - My Strange Addiction on TLC. We watched for all of 15 minutes but that was plenty of time to understand its allure. It was love at first sight. In a sea of "Point and Laugh" television shows, ones that pretend to be educational but really just want us to laugh at their subjects, this one stands out for the pure absurdity of subject matter. It's not your run of the mill TLC show about a dude who weights 700 pounds or a woman with 6 breasts or womb that can't stop spitting out babies or even the one with the little people. It's something a whole lot more .... odd.
The concept completely straightforward, they profile a bunch of people with addictions, none of which really seem like addictions but rather just odd behaviors, and in a us feel better about the fact that we pick our nose in the car or keep that childhood doll under the bed. Some of the stuff is comparatively normal like scab picking, cleaning, buying shoes, sucking your thumb, Jersey Shore-related problems like working out too much or over tanning, eating crazy shit like toilet paper, detergent, household cleanser, couch cushions (we prefer throw pillows) or your own hair (apparently the follicles are particularly tasty). (They apparently have an episode about someone who's addicted to cats, which we think is totally out of place. Don't you agree Max and Milo? They agree.)
Where the show really makes its mark is with "addictions" that are just so absurd they deserve an entirely separate shows called "The Weird Thing I Do That Makes Me An Asshole." They're "addicted" to things like ventriloquism (?), wearing a fur suit (BTW, it's not a "suit" its a "Fursona" and apparently the woman wears it all her "social events." Really? Does a person who wears a furry suit everywhere really have a robust social life? Here we were thinking people wouldn't invite someone wearing a bunny costume to their dinner party.) or maybe collecting rocks (which sometimes it leads Belinda into dangerous neighborhoods where she picks up a "special" kind of rock.) (Check out the episode guide for more details.)
Of course, we also have two favorites.
The first is Lori who sleeps with her blow dryer. Yeah, read that again - She. Sleeps. With. Her. Blow. Dryer. While it's running. No, it's not because her house is cold or she can't afford heat or something, she's just likes the sound or some crap. In completely unsurprising developments, she's not only been burned been burned by damn thing but her husband left because she was a freak of nature. She didn't need to go on the show to find a cure, we have two easy ideas for her: (1) she could just stop being an asshole; or (2) instead of sleeping with a blow-dryer, start bathing with a curling iron.
Our hands-down favorite is our boy Davecat (we can't figure out if he's related to the small tractor or the comedian who made a career out of doing a weird voice). (Check out the video here.) As you'd imagine, for someone rocking the "Flock of Seagulls" haircut in the year 2010, Davecat (or "DC" as we like to call him) might have a little trouble meeting women. So what does he do in response? What any guy would do, he buys a life-like silicon doll. At first, they date. Like many relationships, it started off purely physical (DC "knew the sex would be amazing" because dong it with am expressionless piece of plastic that vaguely resembles a corpse is ALWAYS fantastical) but eventually due to their shared interests (DC likes to take pictures, she like to sit still) they developed a deeper emotional bond and get married (or pretend or whatever, as if it really matters at that point.) While DC has some concerns that his "silicone wife" will hinder his chances with a "real" woman, we don't share his concerns. We're quite sure that eventually, someday he'll met a special lady whose self-esteem is just low enough to be cool with it. If not, he can take comfort in knowing that "Doll Love Lasts Forever." Creep.
We guess it's possible that these people have some deep-seeded emotional issues but isn't it equally probable that they're just bored and want some attention. If nothing else, we think we've proven if you're going to put yourself on tv and be subject to ridicule, we'll be happy to oblige.
Has anyone else seen this show? Do you have a favorite asshole? Let us know.
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